Yesterday was National Argyle Day and, dammit — I missed it. I’m a big proponent of wearing argyle for nearly any occasion. Argyle is colorful, consistent and Scottish … three adjectives I’d also use to describe myself. Yet on the one day I was supposed to wear it, I forgot.

Argyle fail.

January 8th was also National Bubble Bath Day, which, frankly, is an insipid holiday. Who has time for that? 1) It would dissolve most of my spray tan off and 2) I’m like Goldilocks … the water is too hot then it’s too cold.

In case you weren’t aware, all 365 days of the year have multiple lesser-known holidays, uh, 99.82% of which you won’t find on any calendar. They aren’t usually celebrated. Most aren’t even legit, mind you. Granted, there are some which get more press and respect. (Read that: National Tequila Day.) Some are merely tools likely created by corporate marketing shills to get their name out there. (I’m talking to you National Banana Pudding Day. Thank you, Keebler elves.)

When I hosted KC Live, it was my job to investigate all the alleged pseudo-national holidays. We’d have a troupe of square dancers on during National Square Dancing Day. Or a local chocolatier would hook us up on National Fudge Day. The more obscure and random the days were, the more I’d relish in them. (Come to think of it, there isn’t a National Relish Day. Odd.)

Every year I dutifully look to see if someone has created a calendar dedicated to those various, quirky “National Day” holidays, to no avail. You can bet that January 8, 2017 is officially on my calendar. I can’t wait to break out the argyle sweater or sweater vest and some matching argyle socks.

I’m sure my Scottish ancestors would forgive me for such a travesty. However, I don’t have the heart to tell that I’m probably gonna skip right over National Haggis Day. Blech.