Because I really don’t have enough going on, I just took a gig as the host of a new segment for KCTV5, the CBS affiliate here in Kansas City.  Turns out they liked my fashionista stint for Halls so much, they wanted to make “What The Chic” a weekly feature.  I’m taking my shtick on the road, people.

Beginning next Thursday, I’ll be doing a segment on fashion or entertainment or a blend thereof.  It’s right up my alley.  I used to be an entertainment reporter years ago.  Yesterday, I went in for rehearsals.  I haven’t been on news set in about six years.  A lot has changed.  There are now robotic cameras that zoom and swivel without warning.  If you don’t watch out, you could lose an eye.

The anchor of the show is Carolyn Long, a bona fide pro.  She’s sassy, smart and, from what I can tell, is not appalled by my inappropriate sense of humor.   My first segment this week was on men’s swimwear.  Carolyn and I traipsed to the Jones Pool, Kansas City’s new, downtown rooftop oasis to shoot our segment.

Of course, I was surrounded by four male models with impossible bodies.  I spent a majority of the shoot refusing to exhale for fear of not being able to hold my gut in.  But the guys were polite and pleasant when they weren’t flexing and/or ogling the girls in bikinis.

I actually cajoled a friend of mine Greg to participate in the shoot.  If I looked like Greg, I wouldn’t even OWN clothes.  I would be naked 24/7.  Greg is so buff he doesn’t just have a six-pack, he owns an honest-to-god eight-pack.  He is … as they say in the South … hotter than bacon grease.  I.  Hate.  Him.

The shoot went off with a hitch.  Carolyn seemed to be pleased that I could keep up with her.  Even though it wasn’t live, I was just happy I didn’t fart, swear or black out.   I, somehow, managed to get through it without making an ass of myself.

All in all, everything was pec-tacular.